1.13 Calisthenics

The cursory health examination concluded, the doctor initials my chart and, handing it without a word to the orderly, mopes back to his office where I imagine he spends the rest of the day counting the hours till can go home.

The orderly then shows me back to my cell. He needn't have: I could have just as easily found my way back by following the trail of dandruff.

At any rate, the two of us return to my cell just in time for the start of radio calisthenics. The sprightly plinking of a piano is coming through the speaker. And as I step into the cell, a woman greets the inmates:

“Good morning everyone! Time for radio exercises! Let’s start with back stretches . . . Now, leg and arm exercises . . . For those of you standing, let’s really spread our legs . . . one, two, three, four.“

I don’t know if this is mandatory or not, so, to be on the safe side, I spread raise my arms, one, two, three, four . . . I can’t catch the next bit. Something about . . . What?

“Wind your arms around . . . Now do it in the opposite direction . . . Chest exercises . . . Diagonally and nice and wide . . . one, two, three, four!“

“What?”

“Do it slowly if you’re seated,“ the instructor says.

“Do what slowly?”

“Now bend all the way forward . . . “

I try to touch my toes but something pops in my back.

“Let the tension go . . . “

Yeah, right.

“Twisting exercises now . . . one, two, three, four!”

Try as I might to follow along with the instructions, it’s hopeless. After a minute, I throw in the towel and plop down on the rolled up futon.

Judging by the grunts and slapping coming from my neighbors, it sounds as if all of them—gangsters, murderers, rapists, thieves, and hustlers to a man—are doing deep knee bends and jumping jacks in unison.

© Aonghas Crowe, 2010. All rights reserved. No unauthorized duplication of any kind.

注意：この作品はフィクションです。登場人物、団体等、実在のモノとは一切関係ありません。

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

No. 6 is now available on Kindle.